all of the sudden you are brilliant and i am made to sparkle through knowing you, dumb like a coy fish glinting off a penny: O shiny afterlife, invite me to bed. i, receptacle of dead ends, cannot make grow from seed. cannot convince no child-ghosts to follow me on my matronly references: my knees worn a daughter figure into the luminous bowl of dirt – where my reflection could be yours, could be made more beautiful if i only had the brain to paint myself a landscape. to sit static in the distance – my chin innocently on my knees. insinuated motion in crest of wave: to drown in air, in ceilinglessness. my head is full of water; just plow me already.